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The Foothill Dragon Press

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Satire: Sad Beige children and their stab at nostalgia

Maggie Lay
A sad beige child looks off into nothing as she wears simplistic, neutral clothes. An era of neutrality and modernity prompts the child to uphold a sad, beige closet with no color and no happiness.

As modern stylistic trends grow gloomier and gloomier, even children can’t escape the clutches of the “sad beige aesthetic.”

What happened to the days where kids were dressed in tacky, colorful and vibrant designs? Nowadays, the most color you’ll see in children’s apparel is a neutral green color. The era of sad beige children is an impending threat to society and nobody is stopping its fateful advancement.

Social media platforms have called out the “sad beige baby,” and the parents who raise their children in such neutral, colorless and depressing environments. Nevertheless, parents are not shy when responding to criticism.

Parents retaliate to the hate, claiming that general designs for children don’t match their wanted aesthetic. When did the fun and playful colors offered in kids toys and clothing turn into an issue with “aesthetics”?

As a kid, I grew up with Hello Kitty, tacky patterns and distasteful neon colors filling my wardrobe to the brim. Though they might not have fit a certain aesthetic, growing up with vibrant colors and patterns was vital to the fond memories of my childhood. Having been raised in the era of turquoise blue bedrooms, animal prints and Lisa Frank stickers, I want to sob when I see my little cousin dressed in a neutral romper, devoid of color and style, as he plays with colorless wooden blocks.

Strolling down the streets of Ventura, Calif., the epidemic is undeniable. Children once clothed in multicolored prints are now in sad, bleak apparel purchased from small vintage shops. Downtown Ventura offers an abundance of stores, including many that contribute to neutral products and a minimalist wardrobe, a popular trend in California.

What sparked the sudden change in children’s toys and apparel? The gradual popularity of minimalism and keeping the world boring and gray are to thank for the sudden, detrimental, changes. Another factor is social media; with influencers like Nara Smith presenting their aesthetic life with an emphasis on neutrality and simplicity, parents are choosing to avoid more colorful designs.

Colorful design and print are fundamental components of a lively childhood. Whether it reminds a person of going to the aquarium, playing with their Malibu barbie or going down the Marina Park zipline, colors bring back the most impactful memories of being a kid.

As the depressing stylistic choices of “sad beige parents” dooms the next generation, I weep at the loss of tacky, but nostalgic colors and patterns that are lost with the advancement of modernity. I can only hope that children will look back at their beige, neutral and dreary memories with content.

What do you think?
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About the Contributor
Maggie Lay
Maggie Lay, Reporter
I am a junior news writer who enjoys spending time with family, baking and going to petting zoos.

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Comments on articles are screened and those determined by editors to be crude, overly mean-spirited or that serve primarily as personal attacks will not be approved. The Editorial Review Board, made up of 11 student editors and a faculty adviser, make decisions on content.
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    Julia BrossiaApr 12, 2024 at 12:52 pm

    the marina park zipline is unmatched