Being a twin: An unbreakable bond or a struggle for identity?

Alivia Baker

Peer into what life is like as a twin with writers Claire Hadley and Frances English.

Claire Hadley and Frances English

Twins are often referred to as the same person, but this assumption is anything but true. Whether it’s purposeful or not, many people believe that because people are twins, everything about them is the same. Part of being an individual is having a name that you are associated with, and you can’t obtain that when people don’t even try to know you. Being a twin does not mean that you are the same as your sibling, who just so happens to share the same birthday. However, there are also good parts to being a twin. If one thing is for sure, you know that they’ll always be there for you and you can talk to them about anything. Although the box that people place twins in can be soul crushing, it also creates a strong bond that will last a lifetime. 

Being called “The Twins” or other phrases that refer to twins or multiples as being the same person strips away individuality that twins, like all humans, desire to obtain. Using these titles makes twins or multiples feel like they are seen as one unit. Ignorant people need to know that twins are not the same, they don’t have telepathy, and that they are individuals with their own minds. Twins do not share all of the same characteristics. Merriam Webster dictionary defines a name as “a word or phrase that refers to or that can refer to a specific person”. When people choose to purposely call you something other than your name, it is very dehumanizing.

There are many ignorant people out there who verbally point out the physical differences of twins to their faces. Most of the time it’s because a false representation is thrown out that all twins share the same attributes, so when they see that they have different characteristics, they get pointed out. Abby Schlegel ’25 shared her experience of being a twin, “we do get compared a lot and many people think that because we are twins, that we should be and act the same.” It’s easier to point out these differences because there is no age gap that could provide a reason as to why one sibling is different than the other. 

Being a twin, you get to share many things, one of the most significant being birthdays. Having to share a birthday is all a twin knows, and it can be easy for them to feel underappreciated. Waking up with lots of presents and happy birthdays still feels good, but it can be easy for twins to feel overshadowed and upset when they don’t get a day just for themselves. Little things can become challenging to agree on, like birthday parties, food selection and the entire mood of the day. Many people find ways to make birthdays more fun, like dedicating other days to only one person and hosting separate birthday events. 

A twin will, without a doubt, be called the name of their sibling even if they look entirely different. When being introduced to new people and acquaintances, most people don’t take the time to learn which twin is which or even memorize names. Their names being mixed up can be frustrating to any twin, especially since they know that if they were not introduced as “the twins,” then this occurrence would not take place. For a twin, being called your siblings name is one of the most irritating things to happen, and people who know this use it to their advantage when wanting to get a reaction out of someone. 

There are a lot of little perks to becoming a twin, one being they get to know someone to a vast extent and seem to always seem to know how their twin will react. Being a twin, you always have someone to hang out with even if your friends are all busy. You also have someone to stand in line with so you don’t feel so alone. Being a twin, people always have someone to rely on, who will stick up for them even when worse comes to worst. When you need backup or a favor, you always have someone to go to. Many everyday things make being a twin that much better. 

Being a twin can be an annoying or an extraordinary thing, depending on the relationship and people around them. It is important for people to realize these subtle but irritating issues that twins face. When meeting twins for the first time, people should try to view them as separate people and honor their individuality. 

 

What do you think?